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Very Politically Incorrect
A selection of politically incorrect one liners
What's red and hangs from a tree ?
A sanitary owl
Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra?
When you take it off you wonder where her tits went.
Whats the difference between acne and a Catholic Priest?
Acne will usually not come on a kid's face until around 13 or 14 years of age.
What do you call a lesbian with big fingers?
Well hung.
Why are women and condoms so similar?
Because they're either on your dick or in your wallet.
What do Americans use as contraception?
Their personalities.
A girl and a boy were at the back of the cinema, kissing passionately. When they come up for air, the boy says, "I really love kissing you, but do you mind not passing me your chewing gum." The girl replies, "It's not chewing gum, I've got bronchitis."
How can you tell when you've passed an Elephant?
You can't close the loo seat
Q: What do you call a pissed Arab?
A:Hammed
Q: What do you call a really pissed Arab?
A:Mohammed
What's the difference between an Essex girl and a computer ?
You only have to punch information into a computer once.
Q: Why do Sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
A: So they don't get mistaken for feminists
How do you circumcise a whale?
With four skin divers
What's got two legs and bleeds?
Half a dog!
Q: What's brown and taps at the window
A: A poo on stilts!
A sanitary owl
Do you know why they call it the Wonder Bra?
When you take it off you wonder where her tits went.
Whats the difference between acne and a Catholic Priest?
Acne will usually not come on a kid's face until around 13 or 14 years of age.
What do you call a lesbian with big fingers?
Well hung.
Why are women and condoms so similar?
Because they're either on your dick or in your wallet.
What do Americans use as contraception?
Their personalities.
A girl and a boy were at the back of the cinema, kissing passionately. When they come up for air, the boy says, "I really love kissing you, but do you mind not passing me your chewing gum." The girl replies, "It's not chewing gum, I've got bronchitis."
How can you tell when you've passed an Elephant?
You can't close the loo seat
Q: What do you call a pissed Arab?
A:Hammed
Q: What do you call a really pissed Arab?
A:Mohammed
What's the difference between an Essex girl and a computer ?
You only have to punch information into a computer once.
Q: Why do Sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
A: So they don't get mistaken for feminists
How do you circumcise a whale?
With four skin divers
What's got two legs and bleeds?
Half a dog!
Q: What's brown and taps at the window
A: A poo on stilts!
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