the humor archives

a load of quotes heard at a geek conference

15. "Oh, come on -- Kirk can beat Picard's ass any day of the week!"

14. "Empty the trash cans, someone's lost another retainer!"

13. "I'm sorry, Mr. Gates -- this is a $10 minimum table, the $5 minimum tables are over there."

12. "No, sir, we can't accept Apple stock to cover your gambling debts."

11. "Just shut up and give me the trinkets, booth weasel!"

10. "Free pocket protectors at booth 183! Pass it on!"

9. "Hey, if we all share a limo ride back to the hotel, we can split that dollar tip nine ways."

8. "Well, the Chicken Ranch was okay - but I liked 'Virtual Monique' better."

7. "...so Dilbert says to Wally..."

6. "My dad said if I hacked the Federal Reserve one more time, he'd take away my Nintendo."

5. "...and *I* said, 'That's no hexadecimal assembly code, that's my self-modulating subroutine.' But seriously, folks..."

4. "I don't care if you ARE a CEO, nobody gets in under 21."

3. "Marc Andreeson to the courtesy desk -- Your mother wants to know what time you'll be home for dinner..."

2. "They call this a breakfast buffet? Where's the Jolt Cola and Doritos?"

and the Number 1 Thing Overheard at COMDEX...

1."Hey -- where are all the chicks??"

tags: Las Vegas comdex conference geek geeks